The first few days after I accepted the mission were pretty well fraught with all sorts of emotions...nervousness, anxiety, tension, fear...i had a fairly big lump in my gut as a result of all the unknowns and the fairly daunting nature of the news. That's not to say these weren't accompanied by a healthy dose of excitement as well...they most definitely were. Excitement, happiness, sense of an upcoming adventure, happy-surprise that I actually got a mission.Since that time, things have...gelled...a bit more for me. The nerves and fear are pretty much gone, for now. I expect to experience a resurgence of them as the departure date gets right in-my-face.
But at this point, I'm settled into being enthusiastic about this whole thing...what I'm getting in to, what I'll be experiencing, the work I'll be doing for MSF. I've come to grips, internally, with the fear I was feeling about my role (whether or not I am up to the task). I've accepted that I just don't know, that I'll do the best I can do, and that will be enough. I have to presume that MSF thinks I can do the job or they wouldn't send me. I'll get there, I'll learn, and I'll make it work.
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